Haunted Ebay

I finished re-reading Harvest Home by Thomas Tryon yesterday. It was good, and seasonally appropriate, but a little more misogynistic than I remembered. Of course that’s true of many books I read in my teenage years. I just didn’t realize it at the time.

(If you read Piers Anthony’s Xanth books back in the day, you should take a fresh look. We’ve come a long way, Baby.)

Anyway, before I start another novel, I decided to pluck Joe Hill’s collection of short stories, 20th Century Ghosts, off the shelves.

Which reminded me of one of my favorite “recent” books, Heart Shaped Box.

Which made me start to think about how the main character buys a haunted item from an internet site.

Which made me pop over to Ebay to see if that sort of thing really goes on.

A search for “haunted” returned 49,064 items. Granted, some of those items are loosely categorized. In amongst the supposedly haunted relics, there are listings for EMF readers, Halloween decorations, and such.

But still.

Note: This is not one of the listed haunted items. I opted to illustrate this post with a piece of art from Flickr Creative Commons instead.

Here’s a selection:

1. Haunted? Found in cemetery. VERY HAUNTING!
2. Vintage Handbag & Contents Scarf, Compact, Sewing Kit, Razor Haunted Collection
3. SWEET YET DISTURBED LITTLE ELAYNA. VERY HAUNTED… MAKE HER YOUR SPIRIT CHILD!
4. Vintage Sunday Hat Silk Flowers and Netting Union Made Haunted Collection
5. HAUNTED DOLL **MUST HEAR EVP**
6. *PARANORMAL* Haunted house revenge doll (“Very special vintage Bradley doll with wooden stand of retribution/revenge”)
7. Brass Bottle Opener. Owl Alien Bird Native. WEIRD ~ HAUNTED spirit. Vtg unique
8. Haunted Asian Bead (Yup. That’s a single bead.)
9. Old antique1800’s steeple clock found in haunted estate (non working) with key
10. Is This Clown Doll Haunted???
11. DIBBUK BOX CONTAINING SPIRIT FROM A HOUSE CLEANSING GHOST BOX HAUNTED (If you can make or tails of this rambling origin story – written in ALL CAPS – you are a better reader than me.)
12. No Haunted Doll…headless Doll
13. Haunted Funeral Home: HIGH PARANORMAL ACTIVITY
14. HAUNTED Victorian Dress ! Beautiful Violet fabric W/ Black Appliques – MUST SEE
15. ANTIQUE HAUNTED PHONE!!! HEAVY! 
16. Antique candle stick holder found in haunted estate attic Bid at your own risk!
17. Haunted Antique Folk Art Pre-1900 Very Rare–Been in Family for over 60 yrs. WOW
18. Haunted Carved Wood Duck Figurine Decoy Folk Art ~see orbs ~ Large
19. wood chest haunted halloween witchcraft tarot voodoo satan bible weird bizarre

Just FYI: Many of these listings include some garbled legal-ize which asserts the seller is abiding by the official policies of Ebay, in relation to the selling of haunted items. I cannot find the section of Ebay where this policy is stated. If anyone knows where that is, I’d sure love the link.

For the record, I don’t buy any of it – literally or figuratively.